Friday, December 30, 2016

Fontanna and His Orchestra

Artist: Fontanna and His Orchestra
LP: Music For Expectant Fathers
Song: "Sweet and Lovely"
[ listen ]

Here's one that my friends John and Aine gave me as a Christmas gift three days ago. They were just about to have a baby, and I helped! Funny thing is, I haven't even gotten through both sides of the LP yet, and now it's already démodé. Darla Helen O'Connor was born just a few hours ago! I'm pretty sure she's actually Debbie Reynolds reincarnated. When I meet her tomorrow I'm going to perform "Singin' In the Rain," complete with rotating hand motions. I bet she's gonna' light up like a light bulb—she may even sing along!

I don't actually recommend listening to "Sweet and Lovely," unless you're an expectant father who's so overly-enthusiastic about your forthcoming baby, you need a strong dose of relentlessly nondescript blandness to bring you back down to earth. Any one of Fontanna's selections should do the trick.

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