Wednesday, November 4, 2020

ABBA

 
Artist: ABBA
LP: Super Trouper
Song: "The Winner Takes It All"
[ listen ]

Someone I dated for a while back in 2003 told me that the guy he'd dated for a few months just before we met threw a tantrum when he broke up with him, ranting and raving and going nuts. I decided then that, whenever anyone ended a relationship with me, I'd simply say, "Okay, that's fine." ...and then go do all my ranting and raving and going nuts in the privacy of my own bathroom. My idea is that, when the relationship is over, I'd like my ex to look back later and worry that they'd made a horrible mistake, and that I was the one that they should never have let get away...as opposed to putting on an emotional pyrotechnics show that simply confirms that they made the smartest decision ever when they dumped me. 

And now it looks like the USA is breaking up with Donald Trump. Will we ever look back as a country and wonder if he was the president that got away? I think probably the only thing he could do at this point to make me wonder if I'd cast my vote differently if I could go back and do it all again is this: Instead of offering a traditional concession speech if and when the 2020 Presidential Election is called in Biden's favor, Trump would slowly walk to the podium and stand perfectly still until the cheering crowd has gone silent. Then, suddenly, the opening notes of the piano would ring throughout the room, and Trump would launch into a heartfelt and wistful performance of ABBA's "The Winner Takes It All." As the vocals reach their end and the music crescendos before the final fade, Trump would slowly slink away, finally disappearing into the shadowy wings of the stage. So if he did THAT...maybe. Otherwise, I'm good.

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